hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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