hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize