i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
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He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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