I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
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