what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
