I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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