Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
so much tequila, so little girl.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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