was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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