Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
