AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize