You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
