please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
