me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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