Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
