no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
