Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
