the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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