Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Pooping to opera.
Randomize