Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize