Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.

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(417): View more from Missouri

I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!

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(973): View more from New Jersey

just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.

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(207): View more from Maine

I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers

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(612): View more from Minnesota

just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.

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(407): View more from Florida

So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves

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(802): View more from Vermont

All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.

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(259): View more from

man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!

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