okay pat passed out under dana's car
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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