we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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