So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
