Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize