So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
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