but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
either way he was missing a nipple.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
