All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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