what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Randomize
