She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
