We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
home. puking in laundry basket.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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