You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
