the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i will never coherently bang her
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize
