a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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