no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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