i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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