Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
