I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
