Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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