i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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