im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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