the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
