do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
