if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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