Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize