i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
We're too hungover to prance.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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