I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
