I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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