she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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