Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
