i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize