We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I just blew my weed a kiss
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
